You know about The Café’s Quake 2 Thunderdome by now, but the images don’t satisfy you? Well, in this case I got your back, here is a video to enjoy: the original demo was recorded on an iMac G5 (I played Quake 2 on it), converted into a movie by recording it in OBS on a MacBook Air, edited in Final Cut Pro on the same iMac G5 and transcoded into mp4 using Handbrake. The beginning is missing for a simple reason: in the heat of the moment, I forgot to start recording. Sorry about that :(
The end result is 13 minutes of blood and carnage. Enjoy.
Controversial opinion, right? I mean, it’s not like the latest Apple design choices were out of the ordinary or just batshit-crazy, starting with the famous butterfly keyboard, or the famous Intel Core M-powered 12" MacBooks that struggled to even open Finder, or the one-USB-C per laptop meme that evolved into the two-USB-C per laptop meme, or the Touchbar meme, or the notch-gate, or Liquid Ass, or the orange iPhone that turned pink faster than Taylor Swift panties after a night in SoHo. 2014 to 2025, excepting the 2020 moment when Apple launched their own silicon, was funtime. For the people who used Windows, or heaven’s forbid … Linux.
No sir, Apple shifted from a hardware company into a services/subscriptions company and now is a fashion one. In an alternate universe I would be writing this shit on a watercooled Quad PowerPC G5 Powerbook while carrying the pump like a colostomy bag and enjoy every moment of it. In that universe I’d watch Jobs coming on stage with a baseball bat and proceed to smash the latest IBM-compatible to pieces, while Steve Ballmer chants “DEVELOPERS, DEVELOPERS, DEVELOPERS” all coked out. But unfortunately I’m stuck in a worse universe, writing this on an iBook G4, because everything launched by Apple since 2015 has been plagued by the “creations” of people like Jonny Ive and Tim Cook, strangely, both of them some of the oldest Apple employees. Maybe Steve Jobs was a really good manager and could keep everybody in line, who knows. Or maybe he was supreme in fistfights.
And no, I’m not acting as if during Jobs’ time Apple didn’t had its share of “fun” times with GPU-gate of iBooks and Powerbooks, or the flaming balls of fire that Apple called (and re-called) “Powerbook batteries”. Or the iMacs that could be opened only with suction cups, after you got your very own degree in engineering. But the Apple of that time had some guts, while the Apple of today has Liquid Ass and the pink iPhone that’s actually orange; and I can’t for the love of God (or Allah) comprehend why Tim Cook lacks the power, or ability, or common sense as to do something different (and no, adding another notch to the laptops and call it a day doesn’t count, does the world really need a Dual Notch-Powered MacBook Pro?) and woo the market. Make us watch the next WWDC or whatever it’s called, with our eyes glued to the screen (see what I did there?) while crying like little bitches (but please, no more $7000 MacBooks). What would the Apple fanboys and fangirls do, buy an Asus with Windows 11 and preinstalled malware? No, they will not. The market is saturated with aluminium laptops and glass phones, so why don’t you give us a white polycarbonate MacBook Pro with proper USB-A ports AND HDMI AND MagSafe AND USB-C and Ethernet, Apple? Or make it out of pinewood, just stop with the aluminium, titanium, unobtainium and glass. Just stop.
Well, you probably know about The Café by now: it’s a private, invite-only community I have started on August 29, 2025, after being in development for about one month before. We currently have about 160 members so far, and we talk about various stuff (both on the Café and its dedicated IRC channel), we plan events and do puzzles. And the latest puzzle challenge was something I named Fishy and it involved virtual fishing in the Café’s wate… API for clues and secrets. The reward is a unique member title (<Master baiter>) for the first solver + a cool Café badge, and a different title (<Fisher>) + the same badge for everybody who solves it after.
I’ll let the one and only bonk tell you how the puzzle can be solved, since he’s the first to solve it, and therefore will be forever known in the Café annals as <Master baiter>bonk (because he baits masterfully and not for other reasons, you perverts!):
Short article because it’s pretty easy to get on the Usenet using OS X (Leopard, maybe even Tiger), regardless of current year: basically you need a subscription to a News account, a computer running OS X (doh) and a Usenet client.
The subscription part can be solved for free using the services provided by Eternal September: register for an account on their website, make a note of the username you choose and the password you receive in e-mail and you’re good to go.
You know I said in this article “how I wish I could find a working PowerPC driver” for my Huawei E3131 3G modem? Well, today I decided to do another try and dig the old archives some more. I already had about 500Mb of drivers, all not working on PowerPC obviously, for various reasons (no ppc slice, using a newer version of IOKit, or simply won’t load), and today I think I went over 1GB of drivers and Huawei partner binaries and ISOs.
After patching so many kexts that my fingers went numb, I ran into a kext that looked promising, except it didn’t trigger anything when I plugged my Huawei E3131 modem in a USB port, which means the device definitions were wrong. So, I opened HuaweiDataCardACMData.kext/Contents/Info.plist and I added the three interface definitions for the E3131 modem, PCui interface and diagnostic interface. The modified kext file can be found here, archived.
If you have an older Huawei E3131 3G USB stick and you want to use it, and you run macOS Catalina, you’re in for a wild ride. All the drivers you can find online will not work, and good luck trying to find anything on Huawei’s website.
The only working version of the Huawei E3131 modem driver I could find for macOS 10.15 “Catalina” (and I searched for weeks) is this one. All the drivers seem to be for older versions of macOS (32bit ones, how I wish I could find a working PowerPC driver) and for obvious reasons they won’t work on Catalina.
After installing the driver you don’t even need the bloated “Mobile Partner” software (if you find one that works) from Huawei and friends (ISPs usually re-brand the software using their own logos, colors and unneeded features), you can just pop in a SIM card, switch the device from disk mode to modem mode, plug the USB modem in and go to macOS’ “System Preferences” -> “Network”. A new device will be there, called “HUAWEI Mobile” or something similar, and you can use the *99# Telephone Number to dial using the modem.
The first event organized by the Café members after almost a month since launch of The Café, completed successfully! We launched our own Quake 2 server, everybody was invited to have fun on it, and on September 27, 20:00 UTC time we all got online to eat pizza (like there was time for that, lol), drink beverages, have fun, and definitely make a mess. Literally, I logged in hours after the event ended and I was greeted by the corpses and limbs of everybody who had the misfortune of being on the receiving end of a rocket launcher. We played the q2dm1 map for almost two hours, using various Yamagi Q2 clients, Fruitz of Dojo, GoG and Steam releases, etc, on both modern and retro hardware (I heard there were people playing on PowerPC machines, but their secret is safe with me).
Remember, this is the grind, the battle royale between you and your mind, your body and the devil on your shoulders telling you this is just a game, this is just a waste of time, your opponents are stronger than you. Drown out the voice of uncertainty with the sound of your own heartbeat, burn away your self doubt with the fire that’s beneath you. Remember what you’re fighting for and never forget that momentum is a cruel mistress, she can turn on a dime with the smallest mistake, she is ever searching for the weak place in your armor, that one tiny thing you forgot to prepare for. So as long as the demon is hiding the details the question remains: IS THAT ALL YOU GOT? ARE YOU SURE?
And when the answer is YES, when you have done all you can to prepare yourself for battle, THEN it’s time to go forth and boldly face the enemy, the enemy within. Only now you must take that fight into the open, into hostile territory. You are a lion in a field of lions, all hunting the same elusive pray with a desperate starvation that says VICTORY is the only thing that can keep you alive. So believe that voice that says that “you CAN run a little faster”, and “you CAN throw a little harder”, and that, for you, the laws of physics are merely a suggestion.
On September 27, 2025 20:00 UTC time, The Café gang will attempt to organize several Quake 2 deathmatches (no teamplay) on our own Quake 2 server, for glory or shits and giggles. Everybody is invited to join us in our attempt to have fun killing ourselves in various and innovative ways (just kidding, we’ll mostly die due to failed rocket jumps and grenading the walls).
The Café members will get a shiny new badge to wear with pride (and prejudice), and while the participation is not mandatory, the badge will certify their valiant effort in stopping the Strogg… I mean the Cafégg. In the end we’ll all be Knights of the Shiny Railgun!
If you want to join us, you will need a Quake 2 client (Windows, Linux, BSD, macOS, OS X), the Café Quake 2 server address, 46.226.105.97:27910 (“multiplayer” -> “join network server” -> “address book” and fill that in, IP:PORT format) and about an hour of your free time. Server is running Yamagi Q2 and the map will be q2dm1 because it’s the best-known and the most balanced. You don’t need to do this retro-style on your grandpa’s “computer”, but bonus style points for original Quake 2 CDs, Pentium machines, CRT screens and Pamela Anderson wall posters. Or Nick Carter posters, we ain’t judging here. Tryhards not welcomed!
So, prepare the beer, peanuts, pizza or whatever food-for-the-soul you enjoy, chug some Redbulls, pop that old Pantera casette in your tape deck for extra energy, send the kids to sleep, brush up your Quake 2 skills, wear your id Software t-shirt and practice your rocket jumps.
Welcome to The Café, a private invite-only community which tries to revive the old-school communities of the ’00s in a smaller and not-bloated package.
Since we’re talking about an invite-only community, you will need an invite to sign up for an account. I sent the first “beta” wave of invites to some of the people who e-mailed me about it, but the people who wrote on my guestbook will have to send me an e-mail (because there is no other way I can contact them) so I can send an invite code back. Please do that.
Would my website visitors (and friends) be interested if I start a new private (invite-only) community, on this website? Topic would be anything worth your time (and mine): retro hardware, old Internet, Windows/Linux/macOS stuff, old software, music, movies, self hosting, solar, cyberpunk, promote your websites and ideas, personal projects, as long as it’s not politics and intentional baiting.
No identifiable data will be saved, no logs kept (spam would be pointless since the community would be private, and spamming would get your account removed anyway), I’m thinking about having a mandatory e-mail field on sign-up because I might want to contact you for explanations instead of just nuking your account. I won’t use the e-mail address for anything except that, no confirmations, validations, newsletters, spam, and after creating your account you can change it to something like a@a.com if you’re not interested in future e-mail conversations with me. Nobody else will see your e-mail address and if you change it after creating your account, the original address is no longer visible anywhere, or saved in any logs or databases.
